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If tears could build a stairway
and memories a lane, I would
walk right up to heaven
and bring you back home
with me.
  
This memorial website was created in memory
of my beloved companion, Joe Smith who was
born in Olean, New York on January 07, 1951
and made an untimely departure from this
earth on November 26, 2005 in Eagle Lake,
Florida at the age of 54.
Joe and I had many beautiful memories in the
22+ years we were together. I had two children
that he treated as his own, Jimmy and Melinda.
He couldn't have been any better to our
grandchildren than if they had been his
own. Marriage license or not we
were his family.
Joe was born to George and Joan Forney Smith
(both of whom are deceased), the second child.
He had an older brother, Larry who died in 1990,
a younger sister Cindy, who lives with her husband
in New Jersey, and a younger brother Jon who
lives with his wife in Georgia.
Joe married Linda Cooper in 1970 and had 3
children, Chad, Christopher, and Paula. In 1982
they separated and Joe went to live at Hilton
Head, SC which is where we met in April of 1983.
Although Joe and I were never married in the legal
sense of the word our relationship lasted
until his death in 2005.
 
Joe loved hunting, fishing, any activity involving water, playing poker with my family, making grandkids feel special, bringing me flowers just because I didn't expect them, preparing me meals and bringing them to me because he was afraid I would forget to eat, his '90 Chrysler LeBaron, working 6 and 7 days a week, his friends, neighbors and was always willing to lend a helping hand to those in need.
Truly his only real vice was alcoholism. It destroyed so many things in his life. Joe fought that demon the majority of his life and it was never a battle he was to win. He tried and I believe he is one of the ones that members at AA meetings pray for as being one of the ones that are beyond help for their drinking.
  
Alcohol did not diminish his desire to work and
do an excellent job when he was working and
I think that is why he enjoyed working so much.
Working left him less time to fight his demon.
He probably never missed more than a half
a dozen days from the time I met him in 1983
until his death because of alcoholism.
Joe was highly regarded on his job by men
much younger than himself for his ability to
perform his job. His place of employment was
deeply saddened by the loss of their fantastic
employee. Joe is missed by many more people
than he could have ever imagined.
Joe was diagnosed with a heart condition in November of 2002 and was sick off and on during the last three years. Joe became unable to deal with all the issues this illness brought him. The last year specifically he was out of work due to his illness several times.
In July 2005, Joe learned he had a 16 year old
son named Nathane from a very brief affair he
had while we were not living together in 1988.
Joe made the best of that situation and tried
to be as much of a parent to Nathane as his
health allowed. Unfortunately it did add to
the financial problems he was already
experiencing.
The pains he had, the sickness he felt and the dire condition of his financial state were just too much for him. Ultimately Joe took his own life. In my heart I know he thought he was sparing me the burden of having to take care of him and the financial issues his illness would bring. SUICIDE SHOULD NOT HAVE
BEEN HIS ANSWER.
Joe loved me and our families so much that if he had any idea of the additional trauma involved in suicide he definitely wouldn't have taken his life. Finding him, feeling guilty that I missed signs that suicide was his plan, flash backs of the day I found him, and the hurt I feel because I feel he didn't trust our love would be enough to make it through a natural course of death.
Suicide, even if you have the best of intentions is
never the answer and I find myself daily
reminding myself of that. Joe was a wonderful
person that never really appreciated his worth.
I am hoping and praying that in death he will
have found what he so sadly missed in life.
Joe I loved you then, I love you now, and
I will always love you.
I Miss My Friend
Sung By Darryl Worley
I miss the look of surrender in your eyes
The way your soft brown hair would fall
I miss the power of your kiss when we made love
But baby most of all
I miss my friend
The one my heart and soul confided in
The one I felt the safest with
The one who knew just what to say to make me laugh again
And let the light back in
I miss my friend
I miss the colors that you brought into my life
Your golden smile, those blue-green eyes
I miss your gentle voice in lonely times like now
Saying it'll be alright
I miss my friend
The one my heart and soul confided in
The one I felt the safest with
The one who knew just what to say to make me laugh again
And let the light back in
I miss my friend
I miss those times
I miss those nights
I even miss the silly fights
The making up
The morning talks
And those late afternoon walks
I miss my friend
The one my heart and soul confided in
The one I felt the safest with
A Little About Gary Allan
I would like to say some things about Gary Allan and the feelings I have for his music. I fell in love with his voice and style of singing the first time I ever heard a song by him. A friend at work loaned me his "See If I Care" CD and I just thought he put as much feeling into his songs as any singer I've ever heard in my life. Joe and I used to play pool in the pool room we created after the family moved out and we had the space. He was so good at that game and if I ever beat him I was so tickled even if it was from his scratching. I always told him I'd take slop or any way to win. We would have Gary Allan blasting away on the stereo while we played. My daughter Melinda and I went and saw him in April of 05 at Cypress Gardens. Joe didn't care much for crowds so he wouldn't go. I did call him several times during the concert to let him hear what he was missing.
About a year after Joe died I found out that his wife had taken her life in October of 2004 and so we had been listening to a man who barely five months earlier had lost his wife and 6 children had lost a mother. Anyway I found out he had put out a CD the end of 2005 to help with his healing from that loss. The songs I have added in the audio sections are selections from his "Tough All Over" CD. His songs have made me cry for his loss as well as my own and I think his incredible drive to survive his loss is an inspiration to me. He needs to be patched up inside and I guess that's the way I am.
16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.
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